DIANA'S HEART TRULY "QUEEN OF HEARTS"

The pathologist's attendant for the postmortem performed on Diana, Princess of Wales, confirmed today that her heart was unusual in many ways. Andre Psmith, 32, who has worked as a pathologist's attendant and scalpel-holder for some two years, witnessed the royal autopsy in 1997, and remembers vividly seeing the heart.
"It was greatly engorged for one thing, very large," he revealed to reporters today. "She literally had a very big heart. There was room for at least one small, disadvantaged child to curl up inside." Asked if he had tested this theory, Mr Psmith agreed that a colleague's baby had been "borrowed" for the purpose. "The heart also showed damage, and in many places it was actually broken," Mr Psmith went on, becoming tearful, "She suffered so much, not just for herself but for us all." Mr Psmith, a noted royalist, also stated that the heart was a delicate rose-blush pink "very classy, not like the crude crimson hues favoured by commoners," and that the aorta formed into a delicate crown shape.